Cafe LuLu

 
Friday!  Yay!

Good Things:
+Upped my carb intake yesterday and still lost a pound
+A little late to work but it wasn't my fault.  The train got stuck (and I just happen to be sitting in the subway care w/o air conditioning. Ack!) But I had a lovely conversation with a fellow passenger about Somerset Maughm's Of Human Bondage.
+Also starting to make lifestyle changes such as on time/early to work, getting a morning iced coffee, cleaning my desk, working on things I have yet to master at work.

Areas of Improvement:
+Still need to exercise 
+Still working on morning/evening routine, but I am getting better.

 
Good Things
+Lost another pound
+Arrived on time to work (maybe 5 minutes late?)  anyhoo it was close, plus I stayed late
+More carbs in the morning seem to working to my advantage
+Ate salmon
+Started organizing desk at work; doing a little at a time

Areas of Improvement
+Still waiting for body to regulate to new approach to eating
+Still need to exercise
+Still working on evening/morning routine (but a teensy bit better than last week)

 
Lack of carbs is really making me tired.  Absolutely exhausted.  I put some more carbs in my diet so that I may perk up a bit. Let's hope it works and that I don't gain anything.  

Good Things
+on time to work
+ate breakfast. I had scrambled egg, bacon (no butter, cooked in Pam) and one slice of rye toast.
+Iced coffee, barely a splash of milk and Splenda
+Green tea
+the usual vitamins
+Salmon sushimi and sushi roles.  I took off a little of the rice, again mindful of carbs.

Areas of Improvement
+Getting energy back
+Evening/morning routine
+start exercise
+I'd also like to get to work at 8:30 and leave by 5.  

Let's hope all is well when I get on the scale tomorrow.

 
Good Things
+lost weight
+am consistently taking vitamins
+am drinking water, coffee without milk, and green tea
+early to work 4/5 days

Areas of Improvement
+start exercising
+establish morning and evening rituals

 
Friday!  Yay!

Good Things
+Ate breakfast
+Had vitamins
+Ate Salmon sushimi and salmon rolls for dinner
+Drank (am now drinking) green tea
+Other than the coffee (see below) and green tea, drank water
+Splurged on a large iced coffee, barely a splash of skim milk, Splenda
+Lost another pound.  The weight loss from this week is all from diet change.  I hope things really kick in when I start exercising.
+Consistent LJing

Areas of Improvement
+10 minutes late to work.  Still need to work on that morning/evening routine
+Skipped lunch.  But, I honestly wasn't hungry. 
+Need to start exercising next week.

 
Lost another pound.  

SW 156
CW 153
1st GW 125
Final GW 115

Good Things:

+Ate breakfast!!!
+Arrived early for work
+Lost a pound

Areas of Improvement:

+Continue to work and morning and even rituals.  Still feeling a little rushed and haphazard.

 
Reducing carbs and caffeine is really taking a toll.  I was so tired when I got home today I crashed on my bed and napped.

Good Things:

+15 minutes early to work
+Good performance review
+Salmon, spinach, and Newman's salad dressing for lunch
+Snacked on cheese (did not binge)
+Lost a pound and a half despite cookie fiasco last night
+Drank water
+Had iced green tea from Starbucks unsweetened

Areas of Improvement:

+Need to eat breakfast
+Need to start exercising to reduce anxiety
+Need to start asking for help (repeatedly until I get results) to reduce anxiety
+Need to get set bedtime/morning routine

 
I hope I've finally realized that losing weight isn't just about losing weight.  It's really about getting my shit together.

I need to have routine in my life.  Not the boring, mind numbing sameness that causes one to get into a rut, but the liberating almost rote aspects of life such as eating healthily, exercising, flossing, getting to bed at a decent hour, making friends, having a lover and being in a committed relationship, etc.

My life for the past 3 years has been a little too unwieldy, too chaotic, too haphazard. 

So losing weight is really about a lifestyle change.  It's about having stability. Having a community.  Having love.

Good Things:
+Drinking water all day
+Tea with no milk, only Splenda
+Eating a lunch consisting of pink salmon and baby lettuce with Newman's Light Balsamic vinegrette.  The salmon in the pouch is absolutely delicious!  I may never go back to tuna. Plus it's incredibly healthy.
+Turkey burger for dinner
+Fiber
+Green tea capsules
+Taking vitamins: Multi, B complex, Calcium
+Getting up early. 
+Getting to work slightly early.

Areas of Improvement:
+Binging on cheese and a whole box of cookies.  I need to get this eating under control.  I may seek help.
+Still need to start exercising.  I spoke to my therapist and he said to take it slow.  That the progress I've made this week so far with the eating is great.  
+Need to get to bed at a decent hour.  I'd like to start going to bed at 10pm.
+Need to eat breakfast. I have two cartons of liquid eggs fortified with Omega-3. No cholestoral, no fat, and I think no carbs, too.

 Good Things:

+Arrived early to work
+Had Salmon sushi and sushimi for dinner
+Drank water all day
+Had tea without milk
+Took vitamins: B, Calcium, Mult (in morning), Green Tea (after dinner)
+Went grocery shopping and bought: green tea capsules, turkey burgers, spinach salad, low fat/omega 3 infused liquid eggs, Alaskan salmon pouches (I couldn't find the Starkist tuna pouches, but salmon is better for you anyway)

Areas of Improvement

+Only ate dinner. Also had a turkey burger later in the evening at 11pm which is too late.  I should only eat one main course and should eat before 7pm.
+Did not exercise (but I do have the Pilates DVDs ready).  Need to exercise 6 days a week if I am to meet goal weight of at least 125 by Halloween.
+Need to eat three meals (breakfast, lunch, dinner)  No skipping. Abstinence between meals (no binging, no snacks, no bread, no alcohol)
+Need to write down calories, carbs, and fat grams daily.
+Need to improve attitude. Leaned helplessness just aint gonna cut it.

CW:  156
GW: 125 by Halloween
Ultimate GW: 115 by Christmas

Ok, so that didn't go so well.

But hope springs eternal.

Goal:  Lose 40 pounds in 15 weeks.  I'd like to be 125 by Halloween and 115 by Christmas/New Years Eve.

HW: 170
LW: 100
CW: 156
GW: 115

I feel as if my life is spiraling out of control.  But I can control how often and how effectively I exercise.  And I can control what I put in my mouth.

 All was going well today...

Breakfast:

The usual

Lunch:

Cup of Tomato Soup

Dinner:
Turkey Burger, soy bacon, sprinkle of cheese, organic ketchup on a whole wheat pita
Sweet potato fries


Faux pas:

Chocolate bunny

And I was doing so well.  

Note to self:  No goodies in the house.  If they're not here, I have no cravings.  If there in the house, the cravings begin.

Boo.

Goals for Next Week:
+No goodies
+Finish spring cleaning
+Pilates at least once

 
All was going well... I ate an orange and had a cup of tea.

Then I decided I'd have "just one" of the easter cookies I bought for my sister and bro in law.  One cookie turned into two, which turned into about 5.

Ugh.  They weren't even that good. And now I feel sick.

Any advice on what to do when a craving or desire to binge arises?  

I have been so good for the past three weeks.  What happened?

I threw the rest of the cookies out so as not to be tempted.  I just cannot have sweets or chips in the house.

 I've been feeling unusually run down lately.  Went to bed early last night (well, early for me) at 10pm and slept in.  

Eating was a little erratic;

Breakfast:
Vitamins

Lunch:
Handful of sour dough pretzels
Cup of Swiss Miss cocoa only 2 grams fat 

Dinner:
Turkey Burger with soy bacon strips (so much better for my stomach than the regular bacon, plus much healthier) sprinkle of cheese shreds, and organic ketchup on a whole wheat pita.  Also a handful of sweet  potato fries (baked in the oven using Pam soy spray***)

Probably have an orange and the usual cup of tea.

***Note:  I never use butter for cooking.  I always use Pam cooking spray.  No fat, no calories.

I found if I don't eat breakfast now, my schedule is thrown off.

I'm thankful we have a three day weekend for the holidays.  

Good Things:

Fairly healthy eating today:
+Usual breakfast w/tea and vitamins
+Only one slice of veggie pizza, salad and soy yogurt for lunch (we had a department meeting and they always serve this amazing gourmet pizza for lunch.)
+2 Organic turkey burgers for dinner.  For some reason I was especially hungry for dinner tonight.  The turkey burgers are not ridiculously high in fat (11g ea and no trans fat) plus no carbs.  Had them on wheat pitas.
+Maintaining 150 pound weight

Overall, I'm well within the alloted 1200-1600 daily calories.


Good non-diet related things:

+Not letting drama at home get to me. (If I had, I'd have eating a whole box of the lemon creme cookies like I used to when stressful issues would arise.)
+Getting some stuff done; making a hair appointment and tax appointment for Saturday.
+The fact that I like keeping an on line journal regarding my health and dieting. It helps me look at my eating issues and how they are linked to my emotional issues.  Plus reader comments are very helpful.  (Thanks, Steph!)


Areas In Need Of Improvement:

+Need to get back to walking.  The temperature was in the lower 40s today, and I wasn't appropriately dressed for the walk home.  But that shouldn't be an excuse.
+Need to finish spring cleaning.
+Wrestling a little with the meat/no meat issue.  It seems that red meat, bacon, etc are hard for me to digest.  However, the organic turkey in the turkey burgers did not aggravate my stomach/intestinal issues.  I don't think I'll ever become a full vegetarian or vegan, but I do think cutting down meat considerably for me is healthy.  
+I'd like to lose at least 1 pound a week; perhaps 5 pounds a month.

Ok, so the bacon yesterday was not a good idea.

It aggravated my gastro-intestinal issues, so note to self; NO BACON, EVER!  

It really didn't hit me until late last night.

I also had these veggie chips which were low in fat, sodium, carbs, etc.  I had a few, but I think they added to my stomach/intestinal issues.  So no veggie chips, either.

Ugh.  Not to get graphic, but bloated doesn't even begin to describe how I feel.

****

Here's the top 40 count down for today...  coming in at number 1

Breakfast:

Whole grain total
Tea

Lunch:

Banana and Strawberry soy yogurt

Dinner:

Vegan patty (so good, can't get enough of 'em.  They taste just like veggie Samosas)

Sweet potato fries (thank you no trans fat!)
Orange

Tea later with soy milk and Splenda

****

I need to mix up the menu this week.  Even though I have given up most meat; red, chicken, etc.  I still will eat fish.  I'm thinking of some nice Salmon with broccoli tomorrow and maybe reheat the left over cous cous from last night.  

From my research, I've learned that Salmon is one of the best foods for protein and Omega 3s

*****

Only walked half a mile due to rain and the physical issues detailed above.

*****

It wasn't a perfect day, but I still ate healthy and tackled some minor stressful issues as work without bingeing on carbs.  So small victories.


 

 
This weekend has been devoted to spring cleaning.

Again, I really haven't had much of an appetite since I've been engaged intellectually at work and physically on the weekends with cleaning, etc.

I did drink 3 Bass Ales over the course of Friday and Saturday.  I do allow for alcohol, but only on weekends.  I can't say I really miss it during the week.

I am craving  scrambled eggs and bacon.   Not too terrible considering it's a meal that is low in carbs plus tons of protein in the eggs.  I just need to watch the fat in the bacon.  However, if I relegate a "truck driver" type of breakfast such as this to weekends only, I don't think it will be  problem. 

My only worry is that my body will think this is a "treat" or "reward" for being "good" during the week and I don't want to lapse into using food as a reward.

Do anyone have any thoughts on eating only specific foods on the weekend?  I don't want to deny myself certain foods I have a hankering for but again, I don't want to be tripped up by training my body to expect certain foods as a reward.

 
It was an absolutely crazy day at work!  But very, very good none-the-less.

Weight : 151 (damn bread from last night!)

Breakfast:

The usual (see previous entry)

Lunch:

No time!  Too busy!!!

Snack:

One (yep just one, the other one got all melty and icky!) candy kiss.

Dinner:

Medium cup of Hale and Hearty's tomato veggie soup.  Very yummy, very robust, very thick and packed with veggies.  

Probably an orange later

Ubiquitous cup(s) of tea.

Walked the 1 1/2 mile home from work.

Next week's goals:

I think I'm going to walk to work on Monday (as well as home).  

Things have been a little crazy at work so I've been getting home a little later than usual.  It makes more sense to walk to work since it will be easier to build into my schedule.  I think I'll be too tuckered out from my afternoon/early evening walk to exercise afterwards.

So for now, I'll walk to and from walk.  See how that goes, and then build in exercise.  

 
Worked late tonight.

I recognize that my eating is often tied to emotions.  Especially when I'm stressed, I tend to crave carbs.

As you'll see in a moment;

Breakfast

Vitamins 
Whole Grain Total (no raisins) with a splash of whole milk
Tea (Splenda and just a splash of the whole milk from the cafe upstairs)

Lunch

Raspberry Soy Yogurt (Silk brand, very yummy)
and about 5 thin pretzels

Dinner

Chicken and Mozeralla Tartine on Whole Wheat Bread (Fairly healthy and at 690 calories)


Walked the 1 1/2 mile home from work.

*****


Not too bad.  I was well within 1200-1600 calories.  Plus I got my exercise via my 25 minute walk. But I need to watch the bread/carbs and emotional eating. 

Goals for Next Week:
+Be aware of bread/carbs and the emotional eating.
+Either walk to and from work everyday or continuing walking home from work and start Pilates 

 Today:

Raisin bran Total cereal
Vitamins

Tomato Soup (from the cafeteria upstairs)

Vegan Masala Patty w/
Sprouts
Dash of cheddar cheese
Organic ketchup
on a whole wheat pita

Cup of Tazo Awake Black tea
Soy Milk

And maybe an orange, later

****
Walk 1 1/2 mile home from work.

****

Current weight: 150

 Stats:

Height: 5'2
Age: 41
Starting Weight: 157
Current Weight: 151
Goal Weight: 115
Timeline: 6 months (I'd like to reach my goal weight by September.)

Vitamins:

Multi
Vitamin B
Vitamin C
Calcium

Beverages:

Water
Tea
Soy Milk

3/30

Exercise:

Walked 1 1/2 mile home from work (takes about 20-25 minutes)

Intake:

Total Raisin Bran Cereal w/ soy milk
Soy Yogurt
Large helping of 3 bean salad
an orange
numerous cups of tea with Splenda and soy milk


3/31

Exercise:

Walked 1 1/2 mile home from work

Intake:

Total Raisin Bran w/ soy milk
Organic bean and cheese burrito with low fat Sour Cream
tea with Splenda and soy milk

Wasn't hungry at lunch time.  So I stored my yogurt in the fridge at work for tomorrow.


Goals for next week:

Either start walking TO work (as well as from)
OR
Start doing Pilates